4 Truths I Wish I Could Learn Earlier About Self-Healing
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4 Truths I Wish I Could Learn Earlier About Self-Healing
Welcome!
Today, I want to share 4 truths about self-healing that I wish I had learned earlier.
But before we dive in, let me take a moment to share a bit of my own healing journey with you.
10 years ago, I was a young girl living alone in a big city—carrying deep insecurity and anxiety. I didn’t feel a solid foundation or support in my life—not just from the outside, but from within. I had been trying pretty hard for years—in both work and relationships—just to prove that I was enough. That I was worthy.
And all that effort paid off, at least on the surface.
I grew quickly in my career. I had a high-paying job in my 20s, way ahead of many others my age. I worked with some of the world’s leading brands and became a senior consultant, advising on branding, marketing strategies, and team management—during my first entrepreneurial journey.
But deep down, I was burning out. I remember one night when I left the office at 1 AM. I got home, went into the shower, let the water run down my face, and whispered to myself: “I’m done.” That moment marked the beginning of my healing journey.
I began to realize that for so many years, I had been living in fear—fear of being hurt, fear of not being enough, fear of not being loved. I had always been pushing, striving, controlling... feeling like everything depended on me. I was constantly trying to keep others happy—at the cost of myself. And I was carrying the weight of childhood wounds I didn’t even realize had been controlling my life.
But after starting my healing journey, I slowly began to see:
I had been living in my masculine energy for too long—constantly doing, proving, chasing. And I didn’t have to live that way anymore.
I stopped chasing love and instead chose to love myself—moment by moment.
I no longer placed my worth in how others judged me. Instead, I trusted myself.
I stopped striving constantly and began asking myself: “Why am I doing this?”
I slowly started discovering what I truly wanted in life... and I began to enjoy the process of simply being, without needing to control every outcome.
Healing changed how I saw everything. It gave me the freedom I had always been looking for—and I finally began to build a solid foundation rooted in my self-worth.
So today, I want to share with you: 4 truths about healing that I wish I knew earlier in my life. Because if I had known these things 10 years ago, I would’ve saved myself so much time… so much energy… and so much pain. But before I dive in, just a quick intro:
Who I Am
I’m Sarah Su. I’ve spent more than a decade in international branding, e-commerce, and marketing — working with and consulting for top brands like DJI.
But beyond my career, I began my own deep healing journey—through therapy, counseling, meditation, philosophy, fitness, solo-traveling... and eventually, through faith.
Now, I share insights around self-healing, emotional wellness, and intentional living—because I want more people to start their healing journey and live a life they love.
Truth #1: “Accepting Healing Means I’m Weak”-— No, It’s a Sign of Strength
Growing up in a traditional Chinese family, no one talked about emotional pain. If you were mentally struggling, it was seen as weakness. I once even thought that people who saw psychologists were unstable. Until I became one of them.
When I finally couldn’t hold it in anymore and admitted my inner struggles—I found freedom. It was like I finally stepped out of a cage.
It’s so normal to carry pain. All of us grew up in imperfect homes, with imperfect caregivers. We all carry emotional baggage. We all struggle.
Accepting this isn’t weakness. It’s a sign of courage. It means you’re ready to grow. Because our perspectives are limited—by our parents’ experiences, by our environment. And until we seek healing, we only see the world through a narrow lens. Healing expands your view. It helps you see clearly—why things happened, how they affected you, and how to transform.
So no, asking for support doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you’re choosing transformation. And you should feel proud of that.
Truth #2: “Healing is Expensive” — No, It’s How You Value It
Back in my early 20s, when I first heard about therapy and counseling, my first thought was: “This is so expensive.”A single session might cost $100 to $200 per hour. I told myself, “This is not for someone like me.”
But at the same time, I was spending money on clothes, makeup, skincare, fashion, and fancy handbags. I used to think that was self-love. I believed shopping was healing. Buying new things made me feel better—temporarily. But it never lasted. Later, when I earned more money, I poured it into my appearance: skincare, body shape, anti-aging routines, spa visits... I obsessed over flaws and believed that was self-love. But the emptiness didn’t go away.
Until one day, I finally tried a private counseling session. It was powerful. And I realized...The issue wasn’t that healing was expensive. The issue was that I didn’t value healing enough. I thought investing in skincare made more sense than investing in my emotions and soul.
But later in my life, I understood:The deeper value of healing can transform every area of your life—while the happiness you get from material things is temporary.
Even today, I meet people who earn a good living, but hesitate to invest time and money in healing practices. They compare the cost of healing to the joy of buying a luxury item, a new iPhone, a trendy bag. But those material joys fade quickly. The peace and clarity from healing last longer—sometimes for life.
Healing is not expensive.
It’s an investment in your future.
So now I ask people—when you think healing is expensive, compared to what?
To being stuck for another 5 years in emotional cycles?
To living a life based on fear, not freedom?
Healing gives you back your time, your clarity, and your energy.
And that’s priceless.
Truth #3: “I Need an Apology to Fully Heal”- No, Your Healing Isn’t in Their Hands
I had a client once say: “I don’t think I can ever forgive him. He never even apologized.”
And I used to feel the same.
But through healing, I realized... sometimes we’re hurt not because of just one person’s fault, but because both people had unhealed trauma. When you’re in a relationship—romantic or not—unhealed wounds can get triggered easily. And we project those hurts onto each other, creating more pain. I learned that some people hurt me without meaning to.
And yes—some did it intentionally. But even in those moments, I realized: it had nothing to do with my worth. They didn’t hurt me because I was unworthy. They hurt me because they were unhealed. Even if someone chooses to hurt you on purpose, they’d likely hurt someone else too. You just happened to be there.
Their action doesn’t make you less.You’re still worthy. So now I no longer wait for apologies. I let go. I give myself the closure.
You choose healing because you matter—not because they say sorry.
Truth #4: “I Can’t Let Go of Control Over the Result”-No, True Healing Means Surrendering Outcomes
Some people say: “What’s the point of healing? The pain is already done. I can’t undo it.” I’ve been there.There were times I looked at my life, compared myself to others, and felt like a loser. I thought, “I’m too old now. I’ve already failed.” I was only focused on what I had lost... not what I still had. And in healing, especially when recovering from a relationship, I couldn’t let go of control. I wanted the outcome I imagined. I wanted healing to somehow bring that person back or change them.
But the truth is—healing isn’t about changing the past, it isn’t about changing others. It’s about changing how you move forward. You’re not healing to change the past, you’re healing to rewrite the future. Letting go of control is a core part of healing.
Imagine this: The pain was part of your story for a reason. If not now, it might have come later. So if you’ve already experienced it—don’t waste it. Let it teach you. Let it awaken your self-worth.
These 4 truths—I wish I could have learned earlier. They would’ve saved me years of pain, confusion, and stuckness. And I want you to feel that shift too.
That’s why I created my 4-week online healing program—to guide you through your healing, step-by-step, with clarity and care.
Let me quickly walk you through what’s inside:
Step 1: Heal Your Roots
💛 How to understand why certain emotions keep repeating and easily trigger you — whether at work, in love, or with others
💛 How to put the deep hurts out and confront them with gentle guidance
💛 How to process your hurt feelings and truly let go
💛 How to set healthy boundaries the right way — protect yourself without hurting the people you care about
💛 How to truly forgive and rebuild family relationships (if you choose)
Step 2: Heal Your Relationships
💛 How to understand why you may be stuck in a cycle of hurting each other
💛 How to figure out if you’re in true love or in a trap
💛 How to recognize sabotaging thoughts that quietly damage your love life
💛 How to understand the patterns you and your partner have, discover attachment styles, and uncover the root reasons behind them
💛 How to identify your true needs and expectations — and stop losing yourself trying to please others
💛 How to manage both your expectations in a relationship in a healthier way
Step 3: Heal Yourself Daily
💛 How to fully understand self-love in a deep and practical way
💛 How to build your own self-care routine that truly nourishes you
💛 How to build self-worth from within, instead of waiting for others to give it to you
💛 How to give yourself unconditional love beyond basic self-care
💛 How to connect with your inner child and offer them the safety and love they always needed
💛 How to respond to daily emotions in a way that protects and supports your well-being
💛 How to manifest your dream life
Step 4: Create Your Healing Plan
💛 Set clear healing goals that align with the life you want to create
💛 How to map out a simple, realistic healing plan for the year
💛 How to refine your plan with my 1:1 personalized review and advice
This is a self-healing journey where you take responsibility. I’m just here to walk alongside you.
I’d love to see you inside. Because you deserve a life of peace, clarity, and self-worth.
See you inside.